Five Years Ago?

Right now, I'm in the middle of my exam week. Just today, I'd say I had the toughest paper for this semester. Toughest, in the sense that, lecturer's not helping much, slides were confusing me even more, and honestly I don't even know what I did this whole semester. In a blink of an eye, I'm going home this weekend. o.o It's funny how things turned out, after watching many episodes of How I Met Your Mother, yes, I can rewatch it thousands of times, this episode just got me thinking like, how did I get here? If you asked me 5 years ago, where do I see myself in the next 5 years? I'd honestly tell you I don't know. 5 years ago, I had no idea what I wanted to do in life, having no distinct preferred interest or exceptional abilities in anything at all, I was a mere.. mediocrity. *.* Even though I just read this article on how being mediocre is totally fine, it still gets to you, you know? I wanted so many things; art, engineer, science, medicine, you name it and I can imagine myself being one. But now in this moment of time, I'm in the path of becoming a Social Scientist. Have you heard of it before? I sure haven't heard of it before, 5 years ago. Thing is, I love what I'm doing and it gives me this passion to look up to my lecturers who have knowledge that knows no horizon. ahaha.


Just.. Where am I headed to in 5 more years? Am I even gonna have a job? What do Social Scientists  even do? T_______T When I look at people my age that has accomplished so much more in life, it really makes me wonder what have I been doing my entire life? I'm 22 this year; so that's 22 years of......? I wouldn't say I'm not happy with where I am right now, but, seriously, I envy those people who knows exactly what they want to do with their lives and work their asses for it.

Love Letters to the Dead.

To Read.

I think I should make it a point to note down the books that I read, since I love to read. But honestly, I don't know much about writing reviews or anything. @@ Just.. whatever goes, alright? I bought this book because I was going through list of books to buy on Pinterest when I stumbled upon books that Emma Watson liked. And, truly, I admire Emma Watson because:

1. We share the same birthdate. :P
2. Her HeForShe campaign.
3. I know she's all brains AND beauty.
4. She's really, really hot. T_T

Anyway, I read the synopsis and I thought, hmm.. Pretty interesting. I enjoyed this book, it has quite a bit of literature in it, and it's sort of targeting young adults, but it has its deeper meaning to it. And yeah, it's all in the form of letters, which is pretty much like The Perks of Being A Wallflower. This girl, Laurel, she's trying to cope with her loss. Her sister, May, died a year ago and she still couldn't come to terms with herself because she felt guilty for her death. It's a pleasant read with a hint of love story with Sky, this cool, mysterious dude that actually knew her sister, so that's one thing in common. But, Laurel, having felt as a shadow of her sister's vibrant personality can't help but wish that she was more like her. She tried to be like May, even started dressing like her, but.. they're really different. And May had secrets in the first place which Laurel was trying to deny because she believes her sister to be perfect.

A few of my favourite quotes from the book. =)


And this quote, I could really relate to, especially at this stage of life where I can obviously see the changes that is inevitable among my friends, family, all the relationships that I hold dear to my heart. I truly miss all those times.


Here's a short excerpt from the book:

"There was something shattered in me, and now he saw it. No one could fix it. I had tried to be brave like May, to be bright and free and a bolt of stars, but I couldn't. I wasn't. He'd seen it. He had opened the door to the underneath part of it where I was just her little sister, who couldn't save her or anything. Bad and wrong and it was all my fault. All at once, the blackbirds flew off the trees. Like there was a thing that told them when to go. To some secret place in the sky, before they would have to come back down and find new trees. I think I went with them, but I wasn't sure if I would ever land again."

Too much thinking.


Time has started to really slow down around here. With all of my assignments done, and study break looming in my face, I really have plenty of time in my hands. Initially, it felt good to not feel stressed or weighed down by work, but being the workaholic that I am, I think I'm starting to feel it, the pulling of the edges of my mind to be focused on something. Maybe I should be focusing on my finals, but too bad, I'm not. It just seems so far away right now.Thing is, I'm not even comfortable in my own home. I've noticed that I get a lot more short fused that I used to be but.. Maybe it's because there's nothing much for me to look forward to here. Sure enough, I can count the number of things that make me feel comfortable here. Things have gotten complicated around the house, and with guests, and such, I've just grown accustomed to being locked up in my room. My roommate gives me comfort, and solidarity too. But I still need space from all this. 

Truth be told, I miss my boyfriend so much, and I miss home so much. In a way, I'm running away from reality because I'm just putting of to-do things off, I'm just procrastinating, wasting away, doing anything but work. Nothing is urgent right now, and nothing has to be. I want to just sit around and read and write and dream but.. sometimes, it gets to me. So many things have changed, and it really upsets me in some way that those simplistic things that I took for granted back in high school? Yeah, I really miss that. I miss my girlfriends, cuz they don't seem to be around for me anymore. I miss my parents, when I had to rely on them and not be so independent. I miss my brothers, when we could just wrestle around all day and they'd know all these cool gadget or game stuff that just sparks my interests. I miss all of that, and so much more, but that's the truth of life.

You can't turn back time, no matter how much you want to. It's just like how Barry Allen finally gets his chance to go back to the past to save his mother from being killed, but in the end, he didn't do it. Because he knows that although he had the power to change time, time is an infinite continuum that keeps going on and on and what he has right now is what he should be grateful for. Many opportunities open to me to make new friends to be closer to people, but I constantly push them away because I'm stuck with the ideal of my friends that's in my mind. And they would never feel the same. I just wish the people that matters to me, feel the same way too.

Jay Sern visits!

To Travel.

One of my longest awaited moments in this semester, my boyfriend comes to visit! =) I had a really hectic semester and all I really needed was a getaway to forget all the stress I had to go through. Even though he came right in the middle of my assignment deadlines, I couldn't have been happier to see him. Having him around always makes me 999x happier. I still had classes then, but short classes, so
the rest of the times were spent with him. I was excited to show him my life here, because, truly, I'd want him to know how it's like here. Since he's been to Kuching several times before, it was a really chill trip, doing things spontaneously, no elaborate plans, just going with the flow. That's how we are, and I love us for that.





My coursemates even contacted my boyfriend to give me a really belated birthday surprise. So sweet of them! I was really really touched. <3











I can't wait till we meet again. =) 3 more months.

Road Trip.

To Travel.

I've honestly been feeling a little lost, a little depressed, a little down lately, and.. I don't know why. Is it the feeling of longing for home after a long stressful period? well, probably. But what I know is that I was really looking forward to this trip, and it turned out to be real good. Just a road trip with my coursemates, and I'm ever so grateful for them. =) The great escape I needed. It was Gawai, but we didn't visit any kampung, just opted to spend time at the beach. I've missed taking pictures so much, the colors that I could capture really made me happy. =) I should really use my camera more! :D

Shopping.

To Babble.
Hey guys! Chinese New Year is just around the corner, and let's face it, all of us are busy shopping like crazyyyyyyy. Everywhere I go in Penang, it's traffic jam, and every mall I go, it's crazy packed. Sales are everywhere and people are snatching everything they lay their hands on, but guess what? Not me. :P I don't know why's that, but I can't seem to find anything I like or suitable for me. It's not like there's no sizes or something, although yes, sometimes I'm a bit too small for the clothes in store, but I'm actually an average size. 


That's not the point, anyway, it's just that, I feel like as I grow up - I'm twenty-two this year - I start to look at things on their practical side. As I study in a public university, there's many things that I can't wear - shorts, short skirts, singlets, low cut tops or whatever (not that I have anything to show :P) - so there is a great tendency for me to think, is this practical for me to wear in university? And I tend to LOVEEEE sweaters - even though I cycle to class every day and I live in oh-so-hot MALAYSIA - I still love sweaters. Being a creature of habit, I go for basic stuffs, sweaters, plain tees, plain trousers, plain EVERYTHING. It's starting to get really boring and my friends always encourage me to try something new. But I've always only liked plain things, or polka dots and stripes. That's just me. That's who I am. So for this Chinese New Year, I went to KL with my boyfriend, just to shop. I didn't get anything much. I literally just got.. 3 pieces of clothing. And I shopped for 3 days. 

Sigh, I was really sad, cuz I'm not those girls that shop all year round, I really only shop around this time of the year, so.. When I came back to Penang, I just shopped online. Basically, most of my new year things I bought this year, it's through the Internet, and let me tell you this Mr. Internet, 

I LOVE YOU!!!!

Thank you for creating this wonderful shopping experience for me. But I think I've shopped too much online, I should really stop soon hahahahaha. Getting broke. XD

Happy New Year! :D

To Babble.
What's up peeps? :D I know it's a little late for this post, but.. HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Okay, seriously, it's always been at the back of my mind that I SHOULD UPDATE MY BLOGGGGG!! but I haven't gotten down to it, cuz frankly, my blog has been dead for a long time, and I know that eventually I'm going to get too busy to do anything about it. SIGHHH. But alright, what the heck, I've been itching to write for ages and.. here I am! HAPPY??!?! :D Nobody reads this anyway. :P It's just my journal. :D 

Welcome, welcome, 2015! Looking forward to this new year, cuz frankly, 2014 wasn't awesome. It was one of my toughest years ever, and I'm glad I survived it, and I'm still here. So, bring it ON 2015! :P Just to share a little of my new year's resolution, which I have undoubtedly haven't put it any effort to achieve my resolutions. Basically, it's just three things - 

WORLDVIEW, EXERCISE, COMPASSION.

It may look easy, it may sound easy, but it is not easy for me!! AAAAHHHHH. Let's all work towards a better version of ourselves this year. =)

Cafe hopping ||.

To Eat.
Another round of cafe hopping with Jaysern this time! Went to three cafés again, which is pretty much the standard. After the second cafe, I could barely walk, so let's not get too greedy now alright? :) 

The first cafe we went to was The Lightbulb Cafe, located on Jalan Zainal Abidin. It has a very pleasant atmosphere, and food was really good! I recommend this cafe!
The cafe was quiet because after all, it is a weekday. Customer service was alright, but the coolest thing is there were lightbulbs everywhere! 
Cool or not? Hehe. 
Cheesy Lightbulb. 
It's basically cheesecake with chocolate filling and Oreo biscuit base. Damn goooooood leh! :D it's reasonably priced, at RM 6.90 per piece. 
Creamy Alfredo. 
Cream based spaghetti served with cooked salmon and asparagus. The texture's really good and even though you can taste the creaminess, it's light enough that it's not gross. Most carbonaras tend to give me that feeling. Only RM 15! XD they also have set lunch that comes with drinks and soup which I feel are really good deals!
I wanted to go back to Roti Bean & Town Bikes, but it was closed! :( I really like the salmon egg Benedict. :/ oh well, we went to Pit Stop Cafe instead, just adjacent to Roti Bean on Chulia Street. 
Really nice atmosphere too. There were cushions and sofas all around for chillin' and hangouts. 
Caramel Latte & 3 Little Pigs. 
Reasonably priced at RM 10 for both the omelette and latte. It is an omelette with bacon and cheese, served with toast, hash brown and a side serving of green salad. It's a breakfast dish, but is available all day. :) the Latte is nice too! And I don't drink coffee so, coffee flavored milk is as far as I go. 
The last stop for us would be La Vanille, on Hutton Lane. It's a bakery/pastry shop but they also serve main courses and toasts. Very cute deco! Makes me feel so bubbly. 
Coooool. :D
Tiramisu & Vanilla Roobois? tea. 
The prices were pretty steep, we didn't try anything else other than their cake which is RM 12.90. Tiramisu was decent and the vanilla tea smells good but otherwise just tastes like normal tea. 
That's all for today! It was a good trip. :D Oh, I'm so full... Save meeee!

Friends.

To Babble.
In our life, there are ups and downs. Everyday, we meet different people. By fate, some of them become our friends no matter if it's through a smile, a friendly gesture or even from a fight. If it's meant to be, it will be. There are so many relationships; lovers, friends, ex-lovers, crushes, husbands, families, and you could never truly understand how all these will workout perfectly as God has planned for us. As I go into this young adult phase, these kind of relationships have become clearer to me. It's not an easy task. But I'd like to keep everything as simple as I can. High school is where you build this foundation of trust into adulthood. It's really funny how things turn out. 

Strangers becoming best friends and best friends becoming strangers. 

But all that really matters is that you hold on tightly to your close circle of friends and raid through the obstacles of life. :) A very last minute plan, seriously, Caryn just wants some sun because she's becoming a pale vampire soon. I'm dark enough as it is, but okay, I just follow through. Really relaxing and full of laughter beach trip. =)




DCOVA cafe.

To Eat.
It's not a usual thing for my family to go all the way to town for dinner on a weekend but my dad was pretty excited about this new place he heard from his colleagues. So all right, we went all the way to Bishop Street which takes about 30 mins roughly (I live near Teluk Kumbar) XD and then we found the place easily. It was located in between The Cruises Steakhouse and Traffic. 
It looked really nice, with the domed-roof and the crawling money plants that just adds to the western feel. Apparently, it's French. I think. Okay I'm not too sure either. Anyhow, we went in and the cafe's pretty small but we managed to get a tiny table for the three of us. We arrived just on time because people started filing in moments later. Prices were reasonable. No dish was above RM 20, which was quite surprising for a cafe. Coffees were priced at about RM 10, per usual. 
We were all wondering how we were gonna eat properly because the table was so small and the plates were pretty huge. Turns out we didn't have to worry about that because they served us so slowly that the dishes came out one by one. As in, the first dish came, and we finished it. Then the second, and the third followed. All after we've finished each dish. I've heard that the cheese baked rice was good but they told us it was sold old. The selections on the menu was limited so we just ordered three different pastas. There were only about 5 tables in the cafe but the service was pretty bad. They took about 40 minutes to serve the first dish. 
The Carbonara. 
Served with a raw egg on top of it. Pretty nice. The cream was just of the right blend so it doesn't taste too sticky. Add in a dash of salt and pepper to taste and it turns out not bad. 
Prawn Aglio Olio. 
As an Aglio olio fan myself, of course I wanna try this! XD I practically try aglio olio anywhere that serves them. It's spicy, which is good. But the prawns were not seasoned thoroughly enough. It could've used a sprinkle of cheddar on top because that's how I would like it better. 
Bacon al Dente. 
Didn't enjoy this dish much. Nothing special about it and we were all quite agitated by the way they served one dish at a time only. We didn't even bother trying the desserts because the surroundings were getting too noisy and my mum wanted to leave already. Not my most pleasant cafe dining experience, I would say. I doubt I'll go back. :/ 

Café hopping.

To Eat.
Our first stop was at Love Bites along Nagore Road. It was pretty easy to find but I think we were a little too blind! XD if you've been to Piknik, it's just two doors away from it. The signboard is pretty big, but we somehow missed it and had to go around the place a few times. 

We arrived around 12 pm, which is pretty early for lunch time. The cafe was empty, and we were greeted warmly by the waiter. He speaks good English and has good manners and we were really satisfied with the service. :) 
Apple Yogurt. 
It has a really creamy base to it, and I like it that the yogurt taste is finished with the apple flavor. 
Pasta Al Fungi. 
It smells like Hokkien Char initially, but actually tastes pretty good. There are a few types of mushroom; button, oyster, enoki. 
Choco Toast. 
The bread is crispy even on the inside, and the ice cream makes the bread smooth to the throat. The black thing by the side is a sesame-coated marshmallow. 
Next stop was the Haven Harbor in the Chime Heritage building. :) it's the corner lot! The interior is pretty simple with a bar for drinks and the kitchen is located further at the back. A few tables are laid out but the cafe is pretty small. 
We only had desserts here, because we were aiming to go for more cafés! XD clockwise from top left; Penang Island (egg white with milk? With avocado, honeydew, kiwi & strawberries), Cafe Affogato (the white thing is actually vanilla ice cream), hot Belgium Chocolate and last but not least, Chime Brûlée. I personally love creme brûlées, this one is pretty nice but nothing special about it. 
Our last stop is Roti Bean which is at Chulia Street. :D it's a small cosy cafe with reasonable prices which I'm really happy about. You have to go upstairs for more tables and the tables have this really cute checkered picnic table cloths. Prepare for more mouth-watering foods! 
Smoked salmon egg's Benedict. 
Holy crap! It tastes abit funky and I don't even really know what it is, but it's good! Funky-good. :D the hollandaise sauce blankets the salmon and bread nicely while the mashed potatoes are cooked just nice. :)
Garlic toast with half-boiled egg, which is pretty nice as well.
The garlic flavor is prominent so that's good. :D
We had a little bit of everything and it was  really satisfying! Nyammmm! 
And we are all stories, in the end.